3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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