one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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