For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Randomize
