im gay
i know
yea but for you.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize