His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
