Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
