So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
