Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
