how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Randomize
