fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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