kristin has been a bad kristin
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
