i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
