i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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