So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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