They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
