i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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