oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
