Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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