Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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