just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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