You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
third nipple confirmed
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
