i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
