do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
