then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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