Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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