Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
