Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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