1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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