He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize