You just made me feel so damn special
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
