Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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