I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
