Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
