omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
