Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
