After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
It's never too late to be topless.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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