porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
