I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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