When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
3 2 1 whiskey
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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