Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
we made out on top of his cat.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
