IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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