Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
