I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
