I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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