My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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