does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
