Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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