Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
