I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
did i walk over a car last night?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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