I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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