he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
